Today's liquid-only diet was almost a success... my only let down was when Boy Mate K (that's right, more names to remember!) offered me a jam doughnut. I refused at first but then caved and ate one. And I probably got a bit too happy with the chocolate milk. Ah well.On the plus side, hopefully burned off at least 500 calories at the gym. I know that's seriously laaame compared to some of you but for me that's a start... and I only had a fairly diminished workout (no resistance machines yet, no dancing in the studio) so I figure it can only get better from here! Sucked at the treadmill, ran about 15 minutes then stopped and walked for about 5 then ran for about another 6 minutes... wish I hadn't stopped in the middle, but I had such a stitch! How do you get rid of stitches? Do you just have to fight through them? Man, it SUCKS when you feel one coming on just as you're beginning to get going. Can't imagine having one as you start running a marathon or something. At the end I was so hungry I truly thought my stomach was going to explode.
I hate living with 6 boys.
They do not stop EATING. It is literally non-stop. And they are boys, young blokes, all aged 19 - 20, so they are perfectly entitled to do it, and of course will burn it all off with their super young-man metabolisms... it's not fair! But it's so so hard when you're sitting in the living room trying not to think about food and restraining yourself from running into the kitchen and devouring the place, and they walk in with some delicious looking meals or takeaway food. And it's difficult being with M, too... whenever we so much as leave the house the first and last thing she has to do is buy food. She can't go into a shop for something innocent like milk without buying cookies and chocolate and cake, too. We'll be on the way home from the gym and I'll be absolutely STARVING and the LAST thing I want to do is think about food and she'll make us walk into Subway or somewhere... it's too difficult!
This is the test of the gods. If I can successfully restrict after an entire YEAR of this, there's nothing I can't do!
The other day they were all eating in the living room and I was there and I was SO HUNGRY that I gave up and went into the kitchen, got the milk out of the fridge and tipped myself a bowl of cornflakes. Hadn't put the milk in yet. But then I thought I'd put in too much, so I picked some of the cornflakes out of the bowl with my hands and put it back in the box. And I still thought it looked like too much, so I picked out more and put it back. And I kept picking and picking until there was nothing left in the bowl, so I put the bowl back in the cupboard and put the cornflakes and milk away.
What the...? Am I going mad?
I really, really hope I've lost a lot of weight by Wednesday (next weigh-day - a few pounds will do) as you don't know how close I am to losing all hope. I hate feeling constantly malnourished. I want it to be worth it, and right now, I feel like it's not. I need to see change or I'm going to go mad!
I don't know how I'd do it without you lot here to support me. I don't know how any girl or guy can do it without this kind of support! I really, really want to succeed for me AND for you, but I feel like my body isn't letting me. Just push on, I suppose...
Q x
living with 6 boys! wow not making things easy there! dw you can do it..just persevere and it will defs start to show xx
ReplyDeleteAbout the stitch, I head you should just stretch it out. When i get it though i tend to just switch to the cross-trainer as I don't feel the stitch as much. And doing more than 15 mins of a tread-mill is something to be proud of! :D well done, keep it up, ignore the smelly boys:) xxxxxxxxxxx
ReplyDeleteWhat I hate about human instinct is that so many insticts are much less than useful anymore. Like how it's human instict to devour a stomach of sugar whenever you get the chance, because a long time ago that was not an often chance for people (like, in neanderthal days). That instict is a huge problem for people now. Epecially people like me, who are weak and have that sweet tooth. Nutella happens to be a weakness of mine (:
ReplyDeleteYou live with a lot of boys! Wow, I'd go insane. You're right,I can imagine that being really hard, especially when your human instinct is telling you to eat all those sugars :(
One thing I used to do when I thought of eating something I knew I shouldn't was keep a rubber band around my wrist, and when I thought of eating something I knew I shouldn't, I snapped it on my wrist. It really worked for me, but I need a new rubber band haha (:
I always just run through my stitch and it always, without fail, goes away for me. Except now I have major shin splints from too much running and those don't just go away haha.
ReplyDeleteWow, from your posts I knew you lived with boys, but not 6! Congrats on keeping up such a high level of control with six hungry boys around haha