Lots to say

Feel like I could ramble for hours.

The trip to see my friend was nice - but man, when she said she wanted to feed me up, she really meant it. Do you guys ever find, after restricting for a while, you find it weird how much other people eat? Like, how much they NEED to eat. I've always had a small stomach but I think it's bizarre when what I'd happily call a meal, they think of as a snack and are hungry again in an hour or two. Mad.

My friend H was there and oh god, she's walking thinspiration. She's just so TINY. I forgot how utterly crap I feel in her presence, even if I'm feeling small myself. Even my legs, which I'm proud of for being thin, look mammoth next to hers. Ugh. She's just one of those people who can eat whatever the hell she wants and not put on ANY weight. Uni hasn't affected her at all. Bahhh.

That's cute you guys asking about London. It's weird, I'm so used to it as I live so close and go all the time, but I do get a bit of a buzz being there. It is just an awesome city - well, Central London is. The outer areas get a bit dodgy, but the tourist bits are great. It's funny you said that about London, RaeLynn, how you visited once then fell in love with the place and want to live there in the future, as that's exactly how I feel about New York! I'm OBSESSED with it. It just has so much energy. I can't wait to go back.

It does rain an awful lot, Ariana, but that's just England in general. It was raining a lot today. Bit annoying when you have hair that frizzes up at the sight of it. All Brits complain about the weather (and I mean any kind of weather - if it's raining, it's horrible, if it's sunny, it's too hot, if it's snowing, well that's just ANNOYING) but when I move abroad (which I hope to), I know I'll miss the rain.

But anyway. Restricting didn't go well. But I've got a new determination. I was reading RaeLynn's blog (which you should all check out - I'm not quite sure how to link to it) and I think one of her goals was to lose a couple of pounds a week? So that's my new goal. Stop just HOPING to lose weight. Set a target. 2 pounds a week. If you lose only one? Work harder. If you don't lose any? Fast. Do it!

If I do that, I could lose 10 pounds by my dance show (5 weeks from today, now.) That'd hopefully make me around my goal weight. That's the dream!

I want to change my hair. Again! The red has faded now (if it was ever there), and I'm back to my usual dark brown. I'm thinking - I really want to try dip-dye. I've been watching 90210 a lot and I'm obsessed with Shenae Grimes' hair.


Now, I know I was chatting about my Asian hair and how it doesn't go lighter and if I bleached it'd just go a horrible pale orange - but I was looking at old pics, when I had highlights, and my hair was a really nice golden colour. So I might take this picture to my hairdresser and see what happens. It can't go TOO wrong. I don't want to go as light as she is on the ends of her hair, anyway - that'd look a bit silly on me. It's frustrating as I have to wait til I go home as I can't afford to get my hair done at uni (my mum pays when I'm at home!) and I'm not all that keen on my hairdressers at home any more - they just always seem to leave me feeling a tad disappointed - but hey ho.

My sister had blondey highlights a little while back, but she reckons they had to bleach and then re-dye it. Hmmm.

On other news.

Remember a few posts ago how I was going on about maybe being wheat intolerant? Bread doesn't seem to bugger me up any more, so I'm weirded out, as I STILL get bloated and feel horrible and gassy when I eat. I saw Ariana's blog recently, excuse me for quoting her.

"I think I might be developing lactose intolerance, but I'm not sure. I looked up the symptoms which included being bloated, distended stomach, and having lots of gas after consuming dairy-all I which I have."

I get that a lot too. I only figure it's dairy because I notice it's after coffee. I should really do some food tests. Maybe, tomorrow, I'll try and get through the whole day without consuming dairy. I could live on soya milk! I eat soya butter anyway. Would this mean I couldn't eat chocolate?? I'd better test this out. This could solve all my horrible stomach issues.

I'm writing this in the living room and this is a BAD idea. A keeps looking at my computer. I have to panic and close the screen really quickly. He's gotten close to seeing all this a couple of times, so I'm glad he's just an oblivious bloke.

Alright, I'm out now. I'm gonna weigh myself tomorrow morning and then lose weight Tuesday to Tuesday. Time to get serious!

Q x

EDIT: Googled 'lactose intolerance'.

"It is estimated that around 5% of adults in the UK have lactose intolerance.

It is more common among people of some ethnic origins, and particularly people who do not traditionally have milk as part of their diet. Lactose intolerance is thought to occur in:

• between 50–80% of people of Hispanic, south Indian, black or Ashkenazi Jewish ethnicity
• almost 100% of people of American Indian, or Asian, ethnicity"

100% of people of Asian ethnicity?

Doh.